Friday, December 2, 2016

Five Zero

Dreading it like death...
Another year of becoming nothing...
Empty...
Fat...
Alone on the phone but nobody's speaking...
Oh death, do you have to whisper sweet nothings?
And how could you whisper sweet nothings to nobody?
A ghost among the living...
Deep in a dark forest...
Unforgiven...
I swallow down a forever sleep...
When Morpheus arrives it's then I will glide...
On the wings of a pig not Pegasus...
To a shit pit of mud and worms.
Germs.
Gobble me up so I don't reach the day ...
I turn 50.

Maculate Macabre

Eyes plucked out like feathers..
Drift upon the wind...
A sea of sequelity unable to live up to expectation...
Only looking into the hour glass from outside the hour...
Without a minute to spare..
Spores of tendons bounce to the beat of the dead drum...
Leeching lessons of festive nonsense...
Alienation like no nation of Trumps and puppets...
Seize the quintuplets and even though the five are alive,
It's not the number of completion...
Brain cells swirl into infinity...
Dark matter is the divinity...
While the blood runs black as night...
Oozing from every orifice...
Purple haze...
In a daze...
As the life drains out into the monstrosity sealed within this skin.
Bathed in dread.
Maculate.
A beautiful macabre.

Left Behind


Left behind like food that wasn't eaten...
Wasted after being tasted...
Cut off from crucial source of sustenance...
Spoiled, soured rotting..a benevolent being of abandonment....

Oh decay, I say, must you sit and wait so long?
Whilst the throng tramples upon the maggots...
And faggots...as in logs not homosexuals idiot...
Burn at light speed...

Beautiful colors of fascination...creation...
Ashes to ashes... one mustn't strife...
For dark as death...it brings one life.

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Peanut Butter Fantasy

Where in your hair do butterflies find daisies if the black flies circle jerk causing a dark cloud of conscious but have no fear, a weird fat lady appears throwing glittery globs that sprinkle down like jobs of smiles and smithereens of joy that flow like a river of catfish in jelly rubbed with peanut butter fantasy. 

Friday, August 5, 2016

Fragile

Like a salamander's tail, impaled by innocence. The sting of the tongue calls for a tincture of toxin or flood thy veins with dragon's blood while they chew their cud a hoard of robots in top hats smoking like Absolem chained to his hookah. Frail and feeble knows no needle even when the vein wants a drink must be time to think of diamonds in the sky falling like lye frothing bubbles in my eye I want to cry but the tears are torn in too many minutes and time's of the essence but time's in a bottle kick in the throttle for a long sleep cometh.

**strange mood tonight**  

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Visible To Me

Blinders like a buggy horse,
they trod past him like a piece of trash on some sandy sidewalk,
somewhere but no where.
Ignoring faces, avoiding eyes like he's some cancer or dancer and not the normal kind mind you.
Why? I ask, why do they not seek the sageness that seeps from his very aura. Words like a warrior.
Humble yet brave.
A wave of something sweeps my soul into a vibration, a collation or relation,
for tomorrow I pray that he'll stay in the realm of reality safe from their blindness and depravity.
To them he's a vapor but he's visible to me.

Friday, March 25, 2016

The Nothing I've Become


How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb
Without a soul my spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become

Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)
Bring me to life

Frozen inside without your touch
Without your love, darling
Only you are the life among the dead

All this time I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
Got to open my eyes to everything
Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something more
Bring me to life

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)

Would You?


If I disappeared, would you come look for me?

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Home

In the place beyond the river lies a thick wood,
where beams of sun crisscross the darkness,
and towering trees for eternity have stood.
The untraveled road, yet familiar, harkens.
A stream winds through, and leads to a waterfall,
behind which is a passageway,
and following it you hear, 
voices cherished,
and emerging in the clear,
you know that you have perished,
for before you they all gather,
in the place that was once and forever shall be yours,
for you are but of them, as they are of you,
and though we are sent out for a time to roam,
to them we always return,
for they, and it, are home.
Written for me by Kevin Lenihan

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Into the Grey





Not black or white...caught in a tunnel of fog..burnt out...burning...sleepless
turning...yearning for a way out...I slip into the grey.

Friday, February 5, 2016

A Different Library

A different library. Feels familiar, yet not the same.
I haunt the stacks looking for something to capture me.
Poe? Hemingway? Dickens? Each one tempts. For each one,
I reach out to take off the shelf, but something changes my mind.
Perhaps something more modern? A good ghost story?
So many choices in the stacks! 
A woman moves slowly through, scanning the authors. She doesn't see me.
I flatten myself to make room for her to pass.
No excuse me. No acknowledgement. Like she didn't even see me.
Nothing new.
I drift into the modern fiction. King, Koontz, Cronin. I could spend all day here!
I pass a book by Koontz. Dark River of the Heart. 
About to pull this from the shelf...but then I recall the story. A man
drawn to a mysterious pub with a red door. I must have read it before.
Details leak into my mind. Love and betrayal and a terrorist conspiracy.
A ripping yarn!
So many choices. I must get a coffee first.
Out onto the street. I pass young couples and mothers with children and students out early from school. A mailman, a bag lady, Japanese tourists.
None notice me, but that's the way these days isn't it?
When the traffic clears I cross the street to the Starbucks. Just like my Starbucks!
A modest line. Business ladies in nylons and sneakers, hipster dudes with kindles, a father with two toddlers. I wait with them. Silently, of course.
The rich smells of coffees perk me up. the pastries look delicious! Long time since I had a pastry.
My turn finally arrives at the register. By now I'm suspicious. 
Not so unusual to be invisible in the world. Been long used to it.
But this has been different. I'm not going home. Never going home.
This is now home.
Not such a bad home. So many adventures in the library. I can haunt it for lifetimes.
At the front of the line. I try to order. They don't seem to hear.
Louder I try, to no avail. I am unseen, which I am used to.
But no more coffee. Ever again. That stinks.
NOT BY ME BUT GREAT WORDS :)