Waiting

Life flashing before my eyes, scenary moving so fast, seasons changing, geese flying south for the winter, storms raging off the coast, yet still, I wait. It's all a dream or is it...a small light in my imagination fighting to shine through the gray matter..it's like pseudo-stratified columnar epithelium struggling to breathe fresh air...wanting...waiting...on a dimension in which events can be ordered from the past through the present into the future and also the measure of durations of events and the intervals between them...all controlled by time itself. Wishing and hoping...like the flow of sand in an hourglass ...and the elapsed time between the past and the future. Mine eyes fall on my cell phone..then back on the script I'm writing...then on my email inbox...then back to my phone..my head hurts so bad but in all the pain, his voice would make it vanish...and the pain would be pleasure...dreams would be reality if only for a few minutes...an anwer to my prayers that this gut twisting pain would cease. His voice alone is like a vasodilator which relieves tension and eases the painful stimuli....but until then, in pain...
...I wait.

The Storm

Astronomical atmosphere, greyish black, hot air rising, a creation of nature yet to be reckoned with...Power to move mountains, turn pastures into lakes, swallowing up land and people in its path. As damaging as a monstrous storm may be, it is performing a cleansing. Yin and Yang, a perfect mixture of good and evil, and one must wonder if there is a God when they are caught in the middle of the perfect storm. Respect nature and all her fury.

The Hardest Time

The hardest times are those times when I'm alone. Lost in my thoughts...passion...lust for things I want but do not have...cannot have...like a prisoner locked away in a small cell...a dark cell...deprived of touch...love...a love that is equal to mine...a love that would move oceans and create new stars...I sit down to write and thoughts of him consume my mind...sometimes it's as if I'm possessed or if I've lived in a former life bound to this person...something there that draws me...and I can fight it ...the urge..the passion...most times....

But not when I'm alone. It's the hardest time.

An Ounce of Hope

In Greek mythology: Prometheus stole fire from the god Zeus, which infuriated the supreme god. In turn, Zeus created a box that contained all manners of evil, unbeknownst to the receiver of the box. Pandora opened the box after being warned not to, and those evils were released into the world; hope, which lay at the bottom of the box, remained. This is the beginning of the tale of hope.

In mine eyes hope is like a dream..to have an ounce, an inkling, is surely better than to have none at all. Without desire one has no hope...without a goal or a wish one has no hope....when I think of hope it's like a vast universe of what lies between a possibility and a sure thing....a large black hole waiting to swallow up that lil ounce ...I fly harder away from the hungry goblin....my wings feel its fury...my muscles ache...my mind teeters on the brink of giving up...giving in...hope is like night and day...a difference of life or death...happy or sad...good or evil...

Goddess give me the strength to always keep a lil hope in my heart.

Over The Rainbow Dreams

Colorful dreams like a rainbow...another world...another love...another chance...a perfect connection...enveloped in more than falling asleep next to a drunk every night of my mundane life....Exploration...worlds...wait to be discovered and conquered...I long to run through a field of wildflowers hand in hand with my equal half...long to sit by a stream and see his reflection...feel his breath against my neck...and hear the sound of his voice...but as I gaze into his eyes...I realize he's only a dream...a part of my imagination that will never be...and I weep and a tear drop hits the reflection...the water ripples...and he is gone.

Friday Song

Take Me

I'd step in front of a speeding bullet to save the lowest scum of the Earth at this moment...a moment of despair...a day so dark not even the sun can penetrate the blackness...lost...in the forest...without my better half...I struggle to breath...to see...but there is no  path before me...only thickened trees with vines that swallow me up...I scream at the top of my lungs, take me now....for I have nothing left to hope for...to live for...but be cast in this eternal darkness without him. My eyes have wept until there are no more tears and fresh hair sprouts like grass from my swollen tear ducts...life all around me when all I want to do is die...right now...this minute..this second...why couldn't I have slipped away peacefully while he was still holding my hand...silence is a weapon much deadlier than any sword. It cuts through my heart like a locomotive...slicing my every hope...being...and now all I'm left with are the dreams...and the DREAMZ...it's all I have...to take with me to death's door. Summon no more...

I'm knocking...please let me in.